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Saturday, February 1, 2014

Sacrifice: an Inconvenient Investment

My poor father is most likely sick of me exploiting stories about him and connecting them to the gospel somehow, but, hey, that's what dad's are for, right? To teach us? And in fairness this involves more than just him, it includes my whole family.
In a family of eight we had problems keeping any sort of junk food around for more than 15 minutes. It didn't matter where you hid what you had, by the next day it was gone. As a opportunist child I often did extra chores to earn money to buy candy to keep in my room. Without fail it would be eaten by someone. It was at these times I would complain and whine until my sister would remind me of the definition of insanity; to do the same thing over and over again expecting a different result.
The main culprit was my Dad, which caused me much frustration. He would always say he would buy me more than I had before but I was too upset and proud to let him. I didn't want him to pay me back because than I couldn't be mad at me anymore.
Fifteen years later I am back living at home again. I have long since given up on hoarding treats and hiding them. I have learned that if they get eaten they get eaten, and now that I have a license, its not so much of a big deal to just run out and buy more.
But this week something happened, and then it clicked. Lately I have had a huge addiction to frozen chocolate that I keep in our freezer to snack on. My mom ate some one night, but it was no big deal, because she replaced literally 10 fold.
As I stacked the candy in the freezer I had an incredible answer to my prayers and thoughts of late. When times are hard, there are a lot of things that get said. From "think about how much you will grow" to "it will be worth it" or "it can't last forever, it will get better". These are all really vital pieces to keeping hope through hard times, but it also isn't really that helpful in the moment. I think, "great, but what about today, right now, right here?" I suppose the Lord knew that I already had the answers, but that I needed to hear it in a new way. As I was putting those chocolates in the freezer it hit me; this is the result of a slight inconvenience-and it has yielded incredible results. Yes, that night when I went to get my candy and it wasn't there I was upset. In the moment there was nothing I could do about it. But after all my past experiences I realized that being upset or refusing a "refund" to make up for it was the wrong thing to do. Instead I said and did nothing. I forgot about it really, and then, the next day, I more than doubled what I had. I realized that I had lost that investment for years by not letting my dad pay me back for the treats he would eat. Even more importantly, I realized how often I had denied Christ the opportunity to make up trials to me. He may take the candy for a bit, a inconvenience and an impossibly long moment, but at the end of it all, I should never let my pride rob me of the investment Christ is ready to give me. It was then I realized that sacrifice is an inconvenient investment.

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